Mid-life Crisis?
I am in the Cafeteria as I type this. 16:26pm
I like to take my lunch break by 4pm because I know one hour after 4pm is 5pm. And 5pm is closing time. Very strategic and calculative of me. *winks
Okay, the real reason is that I don’t like to be in the midst of so many people. I like the peace and quiet of eating alone. Also, unfiltered gist always happens in the Cafeteria.
Why am I writing today? I have struggled for months to ascertain why I write here and share them publicly. It would be different if I write and just save in my drafts. But the issue is posting it for an audience to read. At first, I told myself I wanted to become better at writing. But naah. I know that I know that that is not the actual reason.
So I pondered and wondered. Anytime I wanted to put something out, I would ask why? Why do you want the world to know what you’re going through? Why do you want to tell the world about your struggles? Is it for pity or validation or fame? Heck, everybody wants to put out that thing that catapults them into the limelight for 2 days, lol.
Anyways, I just read an article, and the lady said she likes to post her stuff here so she can come back later to laugh.
So I think I will be sticking to that reason…for now. I like to describe myself a Zany. I make people laugh. I have an interesting mind. So when I write, I like to read what I write from my interesting mind and laugh at myself. So stick with me for now, until I get tired of this reason and need a stronger one. Maybe I will not eventually. We’ll see.
I am deviating. I am supposed to write about a mid-life crisis.
What is this mid-life crisis?
Acne,
Yes,
You saw that right
Acne or skin irritation or whatever.
It suddenly creeped all over my face. What caused it? I had to buy a cheaper soap because I couldn’t afford my normal essentials. For the first week, I thought the soap was working. My pores were closed so no whiteheads. Whiteheads are my major skin concern, and I have been managing them very well for 2 years+. All thanks to God for His provision, I can buy good skincare products.
Right…
Back to the story, I was happy that my pores were closed but my face became oily or glowy as one of my sisters said. I didn’t mind. I don’t like whiteheads at all. But two weeks after I started using the soap, they started coming out. Tiny, annoying, spots.
I freaked out for like three days trying to identify the trigger.
Was it the gel I used on my hair?
Was it the bad water at the office that I used to wash my face?
Was it that time I accidentally brushed money against my cheek? (Money is dirty)
I finally settled on the soap. It was the darn soap. This was a break in transmission.
I live a very routine life. In Murder on the Orient Express, Hercule Poirot said something that resonated with me…
So you see, when this tiny army started breaking out on my face, it stood out like an imperfection. My healthy skin that I had worked so hard on. I became worried, fretful. To make it worse, I could still not afford the essentials I needed to clear them out.
However, I must commend myself for maintaining my sanity through it all. It shows that I have grown. I mean, I am still concerned and worried, but I am not going overboard with it. I got a hydrocortisone cream which I have been rubbing religiously. When I checked the mirror, I wasn’t jumping out of my skin. Old me would have become sad, very sad, frantic, unable to rest. But I looked at myself, and although it looked bad, I know I’ll be okay. Internally, it’s a bit of a struggle, but I am holding my head up high at work. This little inconvenience does not define me. I’m still a fine girl, lol.
Also, God is with me. I seem to be dealing with a lot right now, but God is carrying me. I know it. I feel it.
Isn’t it funny how we let the little things bother us? Not having money? Not having clear skin?
